MARIE HOLMES PHOTOGRAPHY HAS MOVED! JACKSONVILLE'S BOUTIQUE PORTRAIT PHOTOGRAPHER

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Yes.. I'm still here :-) still shooting, still proofing. Working on previously scheduled sessions until I come back from hiding around mid to late April or earlier. I was a little sad today, because I finished my last newborn session until I come back. It will only be less than two months but I can't tell you how much I will be missing it, even for that amount of time. It was a hard choice having to take a step back and take a breather. But for the sake of chaos and a straight jacket (worn by me :) It's just something that had to be done. I have a bunch of new stuff coming out that I can't wait to release! Of course I can't just let MHP fully rest so during this time I've been doing a lot of behind the scenes stuff, but it sure gives me a sense of relief from having to nurse a baby while sitting at my computer trying to meet proofing deadlines or work on the other little aspects of growing my little business here. I was one of those lucky moms that my first two babies slept through the night like little angels. Well third time around folks. Not so lucky. It's all in good fun though, he keeps me on my toes and I couldn't have it any other way.. he's too scrumptious to complain much.

Spring is like a soft entrance to a brutal summer here in Florida, lots of beautiful flowers, weather, colors.. the air is hazy, the birds are chirping or pooping on someone's car. People can walk around wearing clothing and not worry about having to shower and change halfway through the day. It's one of my favorite times to shoot, and be outside taking it all in. It is also busy season. So I just want to give a heads up that: I will be opening bookings around that time (TBA). But from that point forward I will only be able to book between 2-4 sessions a month. I will have available only *2 weekends per month and any other spaces will be early evening 4:30-6:00 pm. So please contact me early if you are interested in a session with me because they will fill up quickly.

and because a post is always better with a picture

taking it all in......
on a side note: I can't tell you how happy I am to FINALLY have my pictures look the way they deserve. Oh blogger you do me wrong sometimes, you just do me wrong.

the one that started it all. Jacksonville, Fl. family photographer

Guess what folks.. it's throw back Thursdays time!!! I am envisioning the arms doing the woomp wommp from Arsenio Hall *not kidding, I am that dorky. Aside from all dorkiness, I know I haven't been keeping up with "T.T's" (It might be smart to figure out a different abbreviation for that on this family photography blog) but I have been working really hard on something for MHP, hence my last post was sort of a breaking point. But I think I have taken a deep breath now and I'm ready to go at it full force. Are you keeping up with me?? For today's Throwback this is the image that is framed and displayed on my wall, along side a black and white picture of my little Cruz.
I took my kiddos out to Fort Lauderdale beach that afternoon, with my little Vivitar point and shoot camera and I captured this picture. Okay with that being said let me give you some background.
previous to this I was a hungry college student/mom trying to find her niche in life. After community college, then university, then Art school. My soul was still searching. I remember when I would sit down with my husband and discuss school plans I would cry. Obviously I cry alot. I would somehow try to make him tell me what it is I should do with my career, my life. He hadn't a clue. I was so scattered with schooling that I confused him, heck I confused myself. All I know is that I wanted answers. Like Now! I stressed so much about it because C ( my husband) had already carved a path for himself in the real world. He had a degree, he knew more or less what he wanted to do and was doing it. Why couldn't I have that luck? I guess taking all of those "pre-you have no clue where you are going classes" were supposed to help me eventually? maybe? But they didn't. At the end of the day, he and I both knew that from the very beginning of our relationship I was always chasing something that did not want to be found, just yet. With much perseverance I decided that I would keep trucking along and try as best I could to put the pieces together.

I knew 5 things. 

1. I Loved working with kids!
   
2. I loved to design, I loved to create, I loved working with colors.
3. My background via my birth father's side (who passed when I was just a small girl) were artists. Everything from entertainment to other different types of mediums.
4. *** I loved taking pictures*** esp of my kids.
5. I wouldn't be satisfied with a typical 9-5 job. Ever.

While liking to take pictures was simply an ordinary thing for most. I had my ah ha! moment.

 The feeling this picture brought to me, was a feeling I had felt before. I didn't know it was there. It somehow all of a sudden creeped up into my soul and found me... and it was then that I decided to stop looking. To jump feet first into a place that I couldn't see if there was something to catch me down below. Needless to say this was a simple snapshot, no editing and the fact that I was no pro photographer then and still have a hard time calling myself even just a photographer minus the pro now. Since then I have been finding my way back up to the light slowly. No more heavy rocks holding me down. I am now at a place in my life where I can play again like I used to do when I was a small kid. The world is in fact my playground.

I hope you have enjoyed today's post. I think I have come a long way as a whole and it just keeps looking brighter from here. 

I am also going to announce that I will be taking a mini blogcation. I am really in up to my eyeballs and sick to boot. I have to learn what I can handle sometimes and I tend to push the limit but over doing myself sets me back instead of moving forward. So with that being said** we shall meet again in a few weeks with MHP's new little secret.

work/life balance. The seesaw of life. jacksonville florida family photographer.

Isn't it so? Sometimes I struggle with knowing what could be the best choice, whether it's the easy, difficult, right or wrong decision. It's the stress alone about making that initial choice is what makes my head spin. I love my kids.. they make my life that much easier. I will usually ask my son "what do you think about blah blah blah...?" and he will answer "whatever you think?", "what do YOU want?" "if you think you should".... same goes for my husband and everyone else in my household. You know actually I am beginning to think they give me these open ended answers because they just want me to..for lack of a better word shut up! What I wanted to get to today is being able to manage a balance between work/home/kids..etc.. I have struggled with this for a while now...and I guess it's time to face fear in it's evil little eye. Sometimes I secretly wish I was Kelly Ripa in one of those Electrolux commercials where she prances around the house cleaning, hosting a party and making chocolate milk for her kids magically appear in their hands in less than the time it takes for the commercial to be over. Either this, or I need an Electrolux appliances. Since this is far from the truth. I have to deal with the reality of it all. I am a wife, and mother of three kids struggling to get her photography business off the ground. When I spoke to my girlfriend the other day as tears of sorrow and leftover overactive hormones drip down my face. She said that I am like a one woman show. As these words escaped through the phone lines and reached me I could actually picture myself like one of those people you see at the fair or on TV with all of those instruments going at the same time. In fact, I have never seen or heard anyone with one of these one man bands that actually even sounded good to say the least. I don't know. It seems like a disaster waiting to happen. Anyway, as I picked myself off the floor and got off the phone.. I went about my business doing what I normally do. Is that it? Do people just go about their business, have one or two anxiety attacks and life goes on after that?? Why wasn't I aware of this before?? It is then when it dawned upon me that although being Kelly Ripa sounds like a lot of fun. It is I that has to face my fear and live my life the way it has intended to be. This is not a commercial. There is no pause or off button. No rewind, no fast forward. As much as I would love to picture this dreamy image of me being able to handle everything with ease. That is not what god has planned for me. That is not who I am, and maybe one day... it is who I have been. So for now, I will keep changing the dirty diapers, making school lunches, untangling curly hair at bedtime, watch series on showtime with my husband in bed, edit, shoot, continue to find inspiration and do my best to push forward. No matter what.

Flash who??

Now, I'm not quite sure how to work this thing to the best of it's ability.. but I made myself a vow that I would start toying around with the idea of using flash this year because as you all know I am a natural light photographer. I'm a strong believer that with natural light you can achieve great results. I also believe *now that with a little extra lighting you can create even more dramatic effects. I'm not one to single any type of lighting source out and with MHP's future plans of maybe one day having a boutique style studio (god willing) I guess I better get started on figuring this stuff out OCF (off camera flash) and all. I borrowed a flash kit and got to try it out on my girlfriend a few months back since then I have it used several times but not enough to really make me excited and now that winter has hit, I'm sold. She was the perfect model! Silly faces and all! love her. Now there are loads of things wrong so don't make me an expert on this. Just having some fun.

Now as her future "friendager" please route all calls to me if your looking for a future supermodel. Please note **nothing*** has been edited except for adjustments in lighting. Yes she's just that gorgeous!

My hero. jacksonville, Florida Family photographer

There is really so much I can say about this, but it's hard enough to even type and that's a first. So I will keep it short and sweet.







To my now eleven year old:

You taught me what love really is..
I learned about happiness from you...
I learned how to forgive because of you...
I learned what I know about living because of you,

There are so many things you taught me in such a short amount of time and for that I am grateful I hope you continue to teach me more.

I am really getting choked up here sitting at my computer writing this, and the truth is that you are my hero. You are more than what I could ever dream of. You are wish come true, a dream, the best gift in life. You are the reason why I am who I am today, and I feel blessed that God has chosen me to be your mother. I hope that I am able to live up to this grand title. I love you.

You would have thought I was torturing the poor kid.

It took all of this....


just to get this.



and that was the best I could do given the circumstances. In the end, I guess sometimes you have willing models and sometimes you don't.

Baby Cruz at 4 months old.